Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Bruce Is Loose, Vols Still Suck

Tennessee looked great last night. They would run blacktops in Knoxville all day. I don't think you could find another five guys off the side of the road who could play streetball any better...actually, I'm pretty sure you could. ''I want to be ranked No. 1 at the end of the year,'' senior guard Chris Lofton said. Not going to happen.

The Vols might be one of the most undeserving #1 teams of all time. Vandy's 6-3 record at home against top ranked teams is impressive, but the Vols are only #1 by default. Shenanigans gives "Coach Ferrigno" too much credit. I don't think I've ever seen the Vols run a play on offense. He's too busy groping Erin Andrews and chasing jailbait. Go get 'em, Bruce.

The Vols shot only 68.8% from the line, 32.8% from the field, and 26.9% from beyond the arch - best team in the country indeed. What does Pearl even tell his squad during time outs or at halftime? "Alright boys...just keep launching 3s, keep them on their heels, and uh...YEAH!!! LET'S FUCKIN' RAGE!"

The great Wayne "Blism" Chism had a great night, scoring 4 pts, including his dunk with 7.5 seconds left. Tyler Smith shot 4-11, and Lofton is a "good" 3 point shooter by volume. Who takes 15 3 pointers in a game? What amuses me is that when Tennessee misses another clutch free throw, they look around in disbelief. They've made a habit of missing jumpshots and layups, so why should they shoot any better at the line? ESPN's late night headline read "Dores look like dangerous tourney team after knocking off No. 1". I beg to differ. Vanderbilt is an average team who beat a shitty one by 3 points.


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